...So, been dealing with some pretty wild weather on the Seacoast of NH these past couple of weeks... I'm learning that life on the beach isn't always so "beachy"... it can actually get quite scary. The day you stand on your front porch and stare out at the waves pounding on the shore, feeling the vibrations of their power in your feet, and watching the sea foam-spray coming up over the sea wall, it can be breathtakingly beautiful and breathtakingly terrifying all at the same time. Tonight when I got home from some much-desired and deserved girl time with a friend, I decided to cross over that sea wall and sit on the rocks of the beach for a few minutes. It was dark, but the clouds had parted and there were stars shining brightly in the night sky. The wind had died down significantly from it's previous force during the day, but it was still blowing the tidal foam around on the rocks. All I could see as I looked out into the ocean, searching for the lights of the Isles of Shoals, was massive waves, all capped with white, and thundering as they approached my position on a rock just mere feet from the path in the sea wall. At first, my breath caught in my throat as I watched this humongous wave approaching, hearing the threatening, thundering crash that announced its arrival. Should I move? Did I even have time to move before the water would rush up over me, ultimately knocking me down upon the dark, wet rocks?
Calm down, anxious Butterfly.
In the 20-30 yards between the crest of the wave and my trembling self, both in alarm and in shivering cold, the wave crashed, splashed, and spread itself out to gracefully creep up the rocks that were still a car's length away from me. I forget how quickly that captivating power can climax and begin to relax, even before the cold, blackness of water can even reach one's feet. I moved only once in the 20 minutes I sat there, when a particularly close wave managed to splash me lightly enough to remind me that yes, Mother Nature was aware of my presence and was willing to play games. I can't even begin to describe the feeling of standing there in the cold wind, which was actually a bit warmer tonight than it has been in several nights, and look out as one after another after another wave crested, crashed, and sprayed up into the dark night sky. Like gentle white fireworks exploding with a thundering boom against the large rock that I once climbed during a bonfire my roommate, our friends, and I had at low-tide. It was thrilling and exciting at the same time, to realize that these waves are actually taller than I am, and hundreds of times more powerful, and I was standing just. that. close.
The last, fleeting thought I had, as I shivered one last time and turned to clamber back up the sea wall and head towards the warm confines of my cabin, was how I wished I had had someone there to share it with. Someone who would understand my awe at the power and beauty and terror that the ocean holds. Someone who is hours away in body, moments away in spirit, and always right beside me in heart.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
Dream a little dream of me...
I had a dream last night! Believe it or not! :-) Lately I have been so utterly exhausted in my waking hours that I never remember what I dream, or even if I do. But last night was exciting and thrilling, and I awoke hours before my scheduled alarm with a gasp, delightfully realizing that my dream was so good that it affected me physically as well as emotionally. I was out of breath, energized, and ready to go!
What was the dream? you may ask. Picture this: a chilly, sunny day, miles and miles of fluffy white snow, comfortable ski boots, a quick ride up the side of a mountain on a ski lift, and then at the top - ah! An endless view of blue sky, white cotton clouds, and snow-peaked mountains glistening in the sunlight. Wintry nature, as far as the eye can see.
I dreamed I was skiing in Vermont. :-)
I swear I could still feel the rush of wind on my face as I slid down the mountain, graceful and cat-like on my skis (which proves that it was, in fact, a dream, as I am anything but graceful and cat-like while on skis...). The biting cold that kissed my red cheeks, the winter sun warming my shoulders and back, and the feel of the frozen ground cutting beneath my skis. It felt so real! It was a bit of a disappointment to awake, tangled among the bedsheets and fleece blankets, to realize that I wasn't on a mountaintop in Vermont, but alone in my bed beside the ocean. *Sigh* Oh well, maybe someday soon....
In the meantime, I am kept busy at the Wentworth. A week ago, I spent three wonderful days with my Burlington Bear, relaxing, reading, exploring... Poor Bear was having a bit of a rough week, so I baked him some cookies to try and cheer his spirits. I had a job interview with Laura at The Essex, which is a beautiful little resort in Essex, right outside of Burlington. The interview went well, despite my being over-qualified for the bakeshop position I was seeking. I should be hearing back from Laura with her decision quite soon. It's strange, but I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing. If I don't get the job, I don't think I will be terribly upset. My plans and dreams of moving to Vermont are, sadly, on hold at the moment due to my incredible lack of funding. Maybe another summer on the beaches of NH isn't such a bad idea...
What was the dream? you may ask. Picture this: a chilly, sunny day, miles and miles of fluffy white snow, comfortable ski boots, a quick ride up the side of a mountain on a ski lift, and then at the top - ah! An endless view of blue sky, white cotton clouds, and snow-peaked mountains glistening in the sunlight. Wintry nature, as far as the eye can see.
I dreamed I was skiing in Vermont. :-)
I swear I could still feel the rush of wind on my face as I slid down the mountain, graceful and cat-like on my skis (which proves that it was, in fact, a dream, as I am anything but graceful and cat-like while on skis...). The biting cold that kissed my red cheeks, the winter sun warming my shoulders and back, and the feel of the frozen ground cutting beneath my skis. It felt so real! It was a bit of a disappointment to awake, tangled among the bedsheets and fleece blankets, to realize that I wasn't on a mountaintop in Vermont, but alone in my bed beside the ocean. *Sigh* Oh well, maybe someday soon....
In the meantime, I am kept busy at the Wentworth. A week ago, I spent three wonderful days with my Burlington Bear, relaxing, reading, exploring... Poor Bear was having a bit of a rough week, so I baked him some cookies to try and cheer his spirits. I had a job interview with Laura at The Essex, which is a beautiful little resort in Essex, right outside of Burlington. The interview went well, despite my being over-qualified for the bakeshop position I was seeking. I should be hearing back from Laura with her decision quite soon. It's strange, but I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing. If I don't get the job, I don't think I will be terribly upset. My plans and dreams of moving to Vermont are, sadly, on hold at the moment due to my incredible lack of funding. Maybe another summer on the beaches of NH isn't such a bad idea...
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
"Liminality"
Liminality is my new favorite word. It is my (not-so-new) existence. As quoted from my deity-sister, who quoted from her mother (my Other Mother, if you will), liminality is "the middle stage of change, the threshold between what was, and what is yet to be." I feel it in my bones, in my being, and in my decision to pack up my life and move to a state where I know next to nobody. I don't know where I will work, or where I will live. But I know that I will live. And I am not frightened. I am excited! I am anxious! I am a little nervous, I will admit. But all of the good feelings take up all the space and leave little room for fear. I'm learning that this is a good way to live one's life: leave very little space for fear. And don't let fear over-stay its welcome.
Reflection: Valentine's Day at the Wentworth went very well! Everyone enjoyed everything, the menu was fantastic, brunch went smoothly, and we didn't run out of anything! I even got a second-wind at about 8 o'clock Sunday night (hour 12 of my shift), and was bouncy and excited. Probably because 9 o'clock was the end of my shift and I was excited to get home to my warm, comfortable cloud of a bed!
And then... Monday... I had a day off! Finally! It was so nice to sleep in until 10am. I spent the morning in bed, reading, relaxing. Then my roommate came home in the afternoon and we made mimosas to celebrate the return of "our house" to being Our House! (Our other two roommates, who were more like squatters than actual roommates, moved out on Sunday). We rearranged furniture, bought new pillows and a new rug, and rearranged our collection of wall clocks (15 and counting!) Tuesday brought with it a wedding cake tasting for a friend of mine, almost a foot of snow, and just a pleasant day. I love the way the seacoast looks under a blanket of freshly fallen snow, especially when it is the light and fluffy stuff. You know, the way it sparkles in the soft light of the street lights or porch lights. The way it creates almost a canopy in the trees, blanketing the branches and bowing them down, almost like nature bowing to your royalty as you cautiously creep your way along the freshly plowed roads towards your destination. Something about the freshness of the snow, before it is salted, sanded, and slushed by the hands of man, is so peaceful and beautiful. Ironically, it is quite heart-warming.
I am off to try and travel a good road in Dreamland. I was rewarded for my patience this evening with getting to spend time with my goddess-sister and my (Sleepy) Bear, who have journeyed from the Frozen Northland to spend a few days here before one heads back North, and one heads to the extreme South. Viva la Mexico! (... I don't think that's what I meant to say, but it's all I could conjure). Tomorrow brings work, wedding cake preparation, and a delightful dinner with my Other Family, whom I've missed terribly but am extremely grateful that they take me under their loving wings whenever I need. And then a quiet night with the Bear. Life is good :-)
Reflection: Valentine's Day at the Wentworth went very well! Everyone enjoyed everything, the menu was fantastic, brunch went smoothly, and we didn't run out of anything! I even got a second-wind at about 8 o'clock Sunday night (hour 12 of my shift), and was bouncy and excited. Probably because 9 o'clock was the end of my shift and I was excited to get home to my warm, comfortable cloud of a bed!
And then... Monday... I had a day off! Finally! It was so nice to sleep in until 10am. I spent the morning in bed, reading, relaxing. Then my roommate came home in the afternoon and we made mimosas to celebrate the return of "our house" to being Our House! (Our other two roommates, who were more like squatters than actual roommates, moved out on Sunday). We rearranged furniture, bought new pillows and a new rug, and rearranged our collection of wall clocks (15 and counting!) Tuesday brought with it a wedding cake tasting for a friend of mine, almost a foot of snow, and just a pleasant day. I love the way the seacoast looks under a blanket of freshly fallen snow, especially when it is the light and fluffy stuff. You know, the way it sparkles in the soft light of the street lights or porch lights. The way it creates almost a canopy in the trees, blanketing the branches and bowing them down, almost like nature bowing to your royalty as you cautiously creep your way along the freshly plowed roads towards your destination. Something about the freshness of the snow, before it is salted, sanded, and slushed by the hands of man, is so peaceful and beautiful. Ironically, it is quite heart-warming.
I am off to try and travel a good road in Dreamland. I was rewarded for my patience this evening with getting to spend time with my goddess-sister and my (Sleepy) Bear, who have journeyed from the Frozen Northland to spend a few days here before one heads back North, and one heads to the extreme South. Viva la Mexico! (... I don't think that's what I meant to say, but it's all I could conjure). Tomorrow brings work, wedding cake preparation, and a delightful dinner with my Other Family, whom I've missed terribly but am extremely grateful that they take me under their loving wings whenever I need. And then a quiet night with the Bear. Life is good :-)
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
The Biggest Storm of the Year that Never Happened
I love meteorologists. I love how they predict the worst. And then I love how wrong they are! Today's snowstorm was supposed to rival that of what was dumped on Washington D.C. last weekend. Hold on one second, let me reach over... and pull my curtains aside... and check the weather...
...*gasp* I see it! A light dusting of snow on the ground! Sweet! I hope work gets postponed tomorrow!
Ok, I'm being facetious. Work never gets postponed, not for snow, ice, rain, hail, or brimstone. So tomorrow, I will awaken at the beckoning of my alarm clock, dress in my very best uniform, and head back to my very own personal Hell. Tomorrow is my day off. *Sigh* Raise your hand if you didn't see this coming: my boss is on vacation in Miami. His flight home to Boston this evening was postponed due to "inclement weather". He won't be returning until 9:30pm tomorrow, leaving Yours Truly to cover his morning shift tomorrow. The things I do for my 'Ler. Friday is my other day off. I will be arriving at work around 4pm to help out with the Winter Wine Festival event. Then this weekend we will be feeding... Oh, 900 some-odd people in total. Guess who is going to be INHALING espresso this weekend?!
Oh right, the Valentine's Day Brunch menu. I promised to post it. It's still in the works, but here is what I have thus far:
...*gasp* I see it! A light dusting of snow on the ground! Sweet! I hope work gets postponed tomorrow!
Ok, I'm being facetious. Work never gets postponed, not for snow, ice, rain, hail, or brimstone. So tomorrow, I will awaken at the beckoning of my alarm clock, dress in my very best uniform, and head back to my very own personal Hell. Tomorrow is my day off. *Sigh* Raise your hand if you didn't see this coming: my boss is on vacation in Miami. His flight home to Boston this evening was postponed due to "inclement weather". He won't be returning until 9:30pm tomorrow, leaving Yours Truly to cover his morning shift tomorrow. The things I do for my 'Ler. Friday is my other day off. I will be arriving at work around 4pm to help out with the Winter Wine Festival event. Then this weekend we will be feeding... Oh, 900 some-odd people in total. Guess who is going to be INHALING espresso this weekend?!
Oh right, the Valentine's Day Brunch menu. I promised to post it. It's still in the works, but here is what I have thus far:
- "Key To My Heart" Lime Tart
- "I'm Nuts For You" Turtle Tart
- "Head Over Heels" Pineapple Upside-Down Tea Cakes
- "Berry Much In Love" Berry Shooters (mixed berry soup)
- Chocolate Covered Strawberries
- "Cupid's Kisses" Meringue Cookies
- Conversation Sugar Cookie Hearts
- Chocolate Strawberry Torte
- White Chocolate "Amour" Cake
- Chocolate Eclairs
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